The alpaca was certainly smacked this week in both the CFFL and the Don’t Fumble League — I was dead last in points. Oof.

The Glittery Alpacas

Things looked scary this week for the Glittery Alpacas of the CFFL as they fell from 3rd to 9th. Down a despicable 14-46 going into the Monday Night Football game featuring the Atlanta Falcons vs. the Denver Broncos, the Alpaca’s had a hail mary’s chance of pulling out a win but needed serious numbers from the Falcons’ QB/WR combo, Matt Ryan and Roddy White. They produced, but it wasn’t enough and it turns out the Falcons’ kicker Matt Bryant ended up locking the win for the Alpacas’ opponent, Stafford Infection, managed by none other than the brother of Harry Douglas’d, the team the Alpacas smacked in week 1.

All that is moot now and I can’t even feel bad about leaving points on the bench because those were equally dismal. Here are the week 2 results for the Glittery Alpacas:

Look at the score — 54-60. It’s the lowest scoring match-up of the week despite featuring one of the CFFL’s greatest rivalries. The Toilet Bowl award goes to Stafford Infection. Nicely done.

What buried me this week was Ahmad Bradshaw, RB of the New York Giants getting injured early, leaving with 1 measly point. Also, my TE Jacob Tamme, kicker Dan Bailey and Cleveland Browns defense combined for a whopping 5 points. Obviously, better options are out there for a kicker when the waiver wire has six of them with 20+ points. Turns out dropping the Arizona Cardinals defense in favor of the Browns due to a match up was a bad move (Cards vs. New England Patriots, Browns vs. Cincinnatti Bengals) but I added them back off the waiver wire this week. Still, my team was in desperate need of a facelift so I turned to the waiver wire. Here was my waiver strategy for this week:

That shit’s intense.

The Alpacas badly need some WR help and acquired it off waivers, dropping RB’s Kendall Hunter and Peyton Hillis in favor of WR’s Donnie Avery of the Indianapolis Colts and Brandon Gibson of the St. Louis Rams. Both WR’s posted solid numbers in weeks 1 and 2, so hopefully one of them proves to be a consistent addition.

I spoke highly of Tamme last week when he was almost dropped from my team but pulled in a late TD to justify his spot. In watching the MNF game against the Falcons I noticed the Broncos didn’t line him up much in a receiving position and when he was on the field he was mostly blocking. He received four looks from Peyton Manning, but only brought in two of them. There are decent TE’s on the waiver wire, but it would be a lateral move to part with Tamme to add any of them so I’m sticking with him for now.

Unfortunately I thought I was set at RB, but with Bradshaw injured and Hillis and Hunter proving to be early busts, my RB pool is a lot thinner. I desperately need Ryan Mathews of the San Diego Chargers to be ready to go this week, otherwise I’m in trouble. There are some options on the waiver wire I’m still considering, but I won’t know about them until Friday morning.

Smack dat Ass

Things were equally pitiable for Smack dat Ass this week, falling 66.45-95.20 to Boom Shaka Laka. The worst part about this loss is Shaka Laka’s manager is a Miami Dolphin’s fan. Look at that hideous logo staring back at me, victorious. Burns me up inside.

The second worst part about this loss was leaving 21.70 points on the bench with RB Ben Tate — who the hell saw that coming? Both my starting backs put up horrendous numbers when compared to their week 1 scores, too. Add to it my not starting two waiver wire pick ups from last week in TE Dennis Pitta and WR Brandon LaFell who both outscored my starters and it’s easy to see I ate a box of F.U.B.A.R. Plus, the Cowboys Defense getting thumped and WR Andre Johnson not producing were the daggers to the heart in this loss.

As expected, waiver wire moves were made, adding the Washington Redskins Defense, dropping TE Coby Fleener in favor of TE Martellus Bennett of the NY Giants as insurance. Plus RB Evan Royster had to go in favor of Giants RB Andre Brown who could be a solid pickup if Ahmad Bradshaw is going to miss some time. I tried getting him in the CFFL, too (he was my first waiver wire choice), but it didn’t work out.

How did your team(s) do this week? Any suggested moves you’d like to see on either of my squads for week 3?

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